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webby4x4
Forum Admin, Magazine Editor
Rock Star
Posts:2375
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| 01/24/2005 6:52 PM |
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Ever wanted to know what your truck/car/4x4's name stood for?
found at http://media-north.com/4wd/humour.htm - (edited for content/fit (some content added too))
AM General - Apparently My Girth Enables Neophytes to End Rollovers At Last
· Hummer - Huge Unwieldy Monster Mashes Every Rock
BMW - Break My Windows / Bought My Wife
Buick - Butt-Ugly Imitation Cadillac Kitsch
· Rendezvous - Roads Easily Negotiated Demand Extra Zeal; Vibration Overwhelms Unsuspecting Simpleton
Cadillac - Crashed After Driver Intercepted Low-Level Air Craft
· Escalade - Embarrassed Stockbrokers Can Always Lie About Dead Electronics
Chevrolet - Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time / Can hear every valve rattle on long extended trips
· Avalanche - After Victims Acquire Lease, Annoying Noises Constantly Heard Everywhere
· Blazer - Bought Lemon; A Zillion Electrical Recalls
· Silverado - Seized Injectors Lack Velocity; Exciting Roll Abruptly Detains Owner
· Suburban - Stretched Useless Blazer Uses Rusty Bolts And Nails
· Tahoe - Total Amateur Hates Onerous Electronics / Take A Hike, Or Else
Daihatsu - Damages Axles In Highly Advanced Technical Situations, Unfortunately
· Rocky - Rolled Over Cliff; Keep Yanking
Dodge - Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere
MOPAR, – Mostly Old Parts And Rust / Miscellaneous Odd Parts Assembled at Random
· Dakota - Damned Amateurs, Keep Out of Tough Areas
· Durango - Drives Unusually Rough And Never Goes Offroad
· Ram - Replace All Motors / Really Awful Mechanicals
· Ramcharger - Radiator And Motor Can't Handle A Relatively Gentle Easy Road
Ford - Forget Off Road Driving / Found On Rocks Disabled / Flip Over, Read Directions / or upside down: Driver Returns On Foot / Damaging Rust Overwhelms Frame
· Bronco - Body Rust Overwhelms New Car Owner
· Escape - Easy Sidehills Can Alter People's Expectations
· Excursion - Expansive Xenophiliac's Cursed Urban Ride Slowly Impairs Owner's Neurons
· Expedition - Exorbitant Xeroxed Product Embarrasses Driver Incessantly; Tow It Out Now
· Explorer - Expansive Xeric Pastures Leave Our Ride Easily Rolled
· Ranger - Retarded Accelleration Needlessly Gets Engine Roaring / Reverse And Neutral Gears Explode Rapidly
Message to Ford Motors: Stop using the letter "x", I'm running out of words!!
Geo - Gross Exhaust Odour
· Tracker - Tough Road Action Creates Knocking Engine Rods
GMC - Got a Mechanic Coming? / Get My Come-along / Garbage Master Cylinder / or upside down: Couldn't Make the Grade / Corroding in My Garage
· Denali - Docile Engine Needs A Little Injection
· Envoy - Expensive New Vehicle Of Yuppies
· Jimmy - Jump Into My Mother's Yacht
· Sonoma - Suddenly Overturned Near Old Mainline Access
· Yukon - Yelling Usually Keeps Owners Nonviolent
Honda - Had One, Never Did Again
· CRV - Crappy Recalled Vehicle / Crying Reveals Victim
· Pilot - Painfully Inadequate Loser Overturns Truck
Hyundai - Help! Yells Unimpressed Newbie, Disappointed After Introduction
· Santa Fe - Sluggish Automobile Notoriously Tepid And Fools Everyone / Sad Attempt Not Too Advanced, Fails Early
Isuzu - It Slowly Undermines Ziebart's Undercoating
· Amigo - Aliens Might Investigate Grabbing One
· Rodeo - Rides On Dry Earth Only
· Trooper - Towing Recommended Out Of Pitifully Easy Rocks
· Vehicross - Very Easy Hill Invites Crazy Roll Over Side Slopes
Jeep - Just Enough Extra Parts / Jinxed Engine Eats Pistons / Jerks Exploring Every Pasture / Joke Electronics Exceptionally Poor / Just Empty Every Pocket
· CJ - Cheap Junk / Children's Jeep / Childish Joke / Claim Jumper
· Grand Cherokee - Grandmother's Ride Allows No Droop; Can't Hear Expensive Radio Over Knocking Engine and Exhaust
· Liberty - Laughable Inferior Box Easily Rolls, Terrifying You
· MJ - My Junk / Motor's Junk / Mom's Jeep / Moronic Jerk
· Scrambler - Sad Crawl Ratio Always Makes Boring Life Excitingly Real
· Renegade - Rolls Easily, Negating Emergency Gear And Destroying Everything
· TJ - Tomorrow's Junk / Tow Job / Try Jacking / Transmission Jammed / Total Joke
· Wagoneer - Willfully Atrocious Garbage; Obviously No Engineering Expertise Required
· XJ - Xeno Junk
· YJ - Yesterday's Junk / You Jerk / Yuppy's Jeep
· ZJ - Zero Juice / Zoological Joke
Kia - Keep It Away / Killed in Action / Know It All
· Sportage - Stupid Psychotic Owner Roasts Transmission And Gets Embarrassed
· Land Rover - Laughing At New Driver, Rolled On Very Easy Road
· County - Crazily-Overpriced Unit Normally Taxi's Yokels
· Defender - Driver Easily Forgets Everything; Normally Disabled on Every Rock
· Discovery - Driver Ignorant; Saves Cash to Own a Very Expensive Ride for Yuppies
· Range Rover - Replace All New Gears Eventually; Risk Of Violently Exploding Rear
Lincoln - Lousy Incompetent Numbskull Crashes; Obviously Legally Negligent
· Navigator - Not A Very Interested Glance At This Overpriced Ride
Mazda - Mindless Automaton Zipping Dangerously Along
· MPV - Mind Painfully Vacant
· Navajo - Not A Vehicle A Judge Owns
· Tribute - Terrifying Roll Into Bushes Ultimately Totalled Exterior
Mercedes - Many Easily Roll & Careen Effortlessly Down Endless Slopes
· ML - More Lift / Money Lost / Moronic Loser
Unimog - Uncomfortable Noisy Imposing Monstrosity Often Grinds
Mercury - My Easily-Rolled Car Usually Requires Yanking
· Mountaineer - Man Overjoyed Until New Transmission And Injectors Negate Electronics, Exploding Rapidly
Mitsubishi - Mournfully I've Tried Spending Unlimited Bucks; I Still Hate It
· Montero - My Overrated New Truck Easily Rolls Over
· Pajero - Poorly-Assembled Junk; Engine Replaced Often
Nissan - Now I'm Stuck, Send Another Nissan
· Pathfinder - People Assume These High-Flying Idiots Normally Drive Easy Roads
· Patrol - Phone A Taxi; Ripped Off Leafs
· Hardbody - Happy And Retarded Driver Basically Only Delivers Yuppies
· Frontier - Foolish Registered Owner Needs To Investigate Engine Replacement
· Murano - Many Unnecessary Repairs Aggravate New Owners
· Xterra - Xtreme Terrain Easily Rolls Risky Auto
Oldsmobile - Overpriced Leisurely-Driven Sport-ute, Made Of Buick's Irregular Leftover Equipment / Oh Look Dear, Some Massive Oil-Burning Idiot's Leaking Everywhere
· Bravada - Beats Riding A Very Ancient Dodge Aspen
Pontiac - Parting Out Now, Totaled It After Collision
Saturn - Slow Americans Take Unmarked Roads Nowhere
· Vue - Very Ugly Exterior / Very Useless Engine
Subaru - Something Usually Breaks And Renders it Useless
· Brat - Beats Riding A Tricycle
· Outback - Obviously Useless Transmission Breaks; Air Conditioning Kills
Suzuki - Slid Under Zooming Unimog; Killed Instantly
· Grand Vitara - Grossly Restricted Articulation Normally Denotes Very Interesting Time At Rocky Areas
· Samurai - Small Automobile Makes Urinals Really Appear Immense
· Sidekick - Slow Ineffectual Deathtrap Endangers Kin In Collision Knockout
Willys - We Invariably Like Long Yank Straps / What Incompetent Losers Like, Yes Siree
Toyota - Tipped Over, Yanked Out To Asphalt
· Highlander - Hopelessly Incompetent Grandpa Hates Lifts And Needs Daily Energy Ration
· Land Cruiser - Lost And Needs Directions, Can't Return Until Idiot Searches Every Road
· RAV4 - Really Awful Valueless 4wheeler
· Tundra - Totally Uncoordinated New Driver Rolls Always
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Rick Webster
Editor, 4X4REVIEW.COM - A Tork Media, Inc. Publication
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'74 FJ40 Land Cruiser
"Measure once, cut twice" |
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